From Shelter Life to a Manhattan Apartment

Today's Guest Columnist Topic:
"From Shelter Life to a Manhattan Apartment: Movin' on Up"

By Lila M., New York, NY

Hi. My name is Lila and I'm a one-year-old white poodle mix.

I was adopted from a Long Island shelter last December. The first few days in my new home were really scary. I just wanted to be the best girl I could, so I didn't play fetch or tug of war or anything like that. I didn't even bark! I tried to just be a good puppy so my new family would keep me. The problem was that my new mommy didn't believe I was even a puppy. She thought I was an older doggie!

Baron really helped me to feel at home with my new family. He sent me a yellow Canine Genius as a “welcome to your new home” gift. It came with these delicious little treats that my humines put inside. The gift was a great choice because I could show my family how playful and how smart I really am. It helped to change my mom's mind really fast! I'm so happy, I love my family, and I think Baron's the coolest! He signed me up for their birthday club, and he even sells healthy food! What more could an adorable pooch want?



Lila M., New York, NY - Our friend Lila enjoying a day at the beach.

Thank you Lila, for sharing the story of your first few days with your new family. We all know how stressful the transition from shelter to home can be. We're glad everything is going so well.

Baron and I would like to take a moment to let everyone know about Whisker Cares, our program to help cats and dogs who, unlike Lila, have yet to find their forever homes.

“Everyone is being affected by the current economic crisis in some way, including animals,” said ASPCA President & CEO Ed Sayres. “Community animal shelters and rescue groups across the country could be seeing an increase in the number of homeless pets they must care for, or a decrease in the donations they rely on to care for those animals. There has never been a better time to support your local animal shelter if you are in a position to do so.”*

Baron and I started Whisker Cares to provide support to those organizations making a difference in their communities by helping animals in need. When you shop at WhiskerGifters.com for pet food, treats, supplies and gifts you can choose a 501(c)(3) not-for-profit animal welfare agency to which Baron and I will donate 5% of the order total (excluding tax and shipping). You have the option of choosing an organization you already support such as a local shelter or rescue group, a national agency like the ASPCA or one from the Whisker Cares list, a compilation of organizations with which we're familiar or to which we've previously donated.

To learn more about Whisker Cares or to request an agency be included on the Whisker Cares list, visit our website or send jester an email at jester@whiskergifters.com.

Sincerely,
Baron, Director of Dog Stuff
Jester, Director of Cat Stuff

Upcoming Guest Columnist Schedule

1. Wednesday, July 1: Minnie M., Tampa, FL regales us with her formerly feral wittiness.
2. Tuesday, July 7: Kumba W., Springfield, MA discusses the power of naming and renames everyone in her family

If you'd like to become a guest columnist, send your article to jester at jester@whiskergifters.com.


*ASPCA Press Release ASPCA Estimates Up to 1 Million Pets at Risk During Economic Crisis. Nation’s Oldest Humane Organization Stresses Importance of Supporting Local Animal Shelters. February 5, 2009.

A Day in the Life of a Squirrel

Today's Guest Columnist Topic:

"A Day in the Life of a Squirrel"

By Lucky E., St. Petersburg, FL

Hi Jester,

Lucky the squirrel here. I've been very fortunate to live in several trees at my current residence. My foster parents are loving people who leave nuts out for me. I also forage around the yard, but the pistachios are my favorite meal of the day.

I've had a brood of little ones and they enjoy the yard also. We pretty much ignore the lizards and birds. We definitely stay out of the way of the family of black snakes that reside beneath one of the trees. There is plenty of food all year long between the tangerine tree and vegetable garden my foster parents keep (woops, don't tell them I've been in there).

Unfortunately the gentleman who lives next door to my foster parents doesn't like squirrels and sets traps out weekly. I've only been caught once and I'm happy to say he's kind enough to let us squirrels loose at a nature preserve not far from my home. Please don't tell him how easy it is to get back home (that will be our little secret).

Life is good...

Lucky



Lucky E., St. Petersburg, FL - Fearing retribution from his foster parents for his escapades in the tangerine tree and vegetable garden, Lucky E. felt it best not to provide any personal details or a real photo. Many thanks to FreeDigitalPhotos.net for helping keep Lucky E.'s identity safe.

Jester and I want to thank Lucky E. for his column today. It's a brave squirrel who lives near snakes and a neighbor with a trap. Now that I know some of the trials and tribulations of a squirrel's life, I will be less inclined to chase them about the yard. (Less inclined doesn't mean I have to stop completely, does it?)

Upcoming Guest Columnist Schedule

1. Tuesday, June 30: Lila M., New York, NY tells us about her adjustment from shelter life on Long Island to apartment living in Manhattan.
2. Wednesday, July 1: Minnie M., Tampa, FL regales us with her formerly feral wittiness.

If you have an article you'd like published, don't hesitate to email it to jester@whiskergifters.com.

Next Week's Guest Columnist Schedule

Jester and I were scheduled to run Lucky E.'s guest column today but have spent the majority of the day listening to "Thriller" while watching "Charlie's Angels".

Next week's guest columnist schedule will be:

1. Monday, June 29: Lucky E., St. Petersburg, FL provides a fascinating look at a day in the life of a squirrel.
2. Tuesday, June 30: Lila M., New York, NY tells us about her adjustment from shelter life on Long Island to apartment living in Manhattan.
3. Wednesday, July 1: Minnie M., Tampa, FL regales us with her formerly feral wittiness.

Thanks for reading. Have a nice weekend.

Sincerely,
Baron, Director of Dog Stuff
Jester, Director of Cat Stuff

A Cat's Fourth Amendment Rights

Today’s Guest Columnist Topic:
“In Support of Animal Rights: If your human finds and removes the toys you’ve stashed under the refrigerator, has s/he violated your Fourth Amendment right to protection against unreasonable search and seizure?”

By Sheppy J. of Port Washington, NY

As it relates to the search for and seizure of your toys, you must first determine if your human had probable cause. He or she may claim probable cause if:

1. None of your toys were visible in any open area of the domicile for several days
2. You were not seen playing with any toys in any open area of the domicile for several days
3. You were seen lying on the kitchen floor with one or more paws under the refrigerator*
4. You were seen and heard sitting in front of the refrigerator crying

However, you may have a case if:

1. Your human searches for the toys, finds them, but does not play with them
2. Your human says, “These don’t belong under here” and then puts them somewhere else
3. Your human says, “ICK. THESE ARE DISGUSTING!!!” and throws the toys in the garbage

The bottom line in legal terms is this: Try not to let any toys get lost under objects too big for you to move.

*Be very, very careful not to allow hearsay.



Sheppy J., Port Washington, NY – “I’m known in my neighborhood as the “go to cat” when it comes to animal rights and the U.S. Constitution. I like reading, listening to Jane’s Addiction and watching George H.W. Bush skydive.”

Well. That certainly gives all of us a few things to think about, doesn't it? Many thanks to Sheppy J. for illuminating an issue that affects all us. If you have an article you'd like published, don't hesitate to email it to jester@whiskergifters.com.

Sincerely,
Baron, Director of Dog Stuff
Jester, Director of Cat Stuff

Upcoming Guest Columnist Schedule
Friday, June 26, 2009: Lucky E., St. Petersburg, FL
Lucky provides a fascinating look at a day in the life of a squirrel.

Be a Whisker Gifters Blog Guest Columnist

An Open Call for Submissions

Dear Canine and Feline Friends,

Baron and I are holding an open call for Guest Columnist submissions for the Whisker Gifters Blog. We’d love to publish information about an upcoming benefit, a “thank you” letter to your foster family, your exposè on the illegal bully stick trade, an analysis of the socio-economic impact of addiction to single source protein treats or any other topic of interest to you.

At this very moment, one hamster, three people, five dogs, eight cats, nine fish and several frogs* are reading the latest installment of the Whisker Gifters Blog. With that kind of circulation, your article will go viral in no time.

Here are the guidelines for your submission:

1. Brevity is good. Four to five paragraphs tops.
2. Cleanliness is better. You can express an opinion, but don’t say mean things or use icky language.
3. Information is best. Our readers are always looking to increase their knowledge on a variety of topics.
4. Include an email address, website and/or phone number so hamsters, people, dogs, cats, fish and frogs can contact you if you’d like them to.
5. Email your submission (put the text right in the email, not in a separate document), a photo (no larger than 72 dpi) and a one-line description of yourself or your organization (i.e., “My name is Fluffy G. I’m from Dallas, TX and my hobbies include grooming myself, knocking lamps through windows while chasing bugs and watching “Real Housewives of New Jersey”) to jester@whiskergifters.com.
   

Guest Columnist submissions will be accepted on an ongoing basis, so there's no deadline. But the sooner you submit an article, the sooner we can publish it. If you haven’t already written something, get started!

Sincerely,
Baron, Director of Dog Stuff
Jester, Director of Cat Stuff

Upcoming Guest Columnist Schedule
Wednesday June 24, 2009: Sheppy J., Port Washington, NY
“In Support of Animal Rights: If your human finds and removes the toys you’ve stashed under the refrigerator, has s/he violated your Fourth Amendment right to protection against unreasonable search and seizure?”

The legal beagle wants you to know that once submitted, all articles become the property of Whisker Gifters. Whisker Gifters reserves the right to not publish any article we feel is not in keeping with our standards. We also reserve the right to edit a submission for space. That’s about it. If they think of anything else, they’ll let you know.

*Not really verifiable.

Birthday Parties for Dogs

Hey Dogs!

Did you know that many a dog celebrates his or her birthday with a party? We’re talking a gala complete with guests, games, game (if you live near the woods and have access to a deer or wild turkey) gifts and treats. Did I mention gifts and treats?

If you haven’t yet had a big birthday bash or are in the process of planning one, be sure to download my FREE report, "5 Tips for a Great Birthday Party". It contains sage advice for creating unforgettable fun, jocularity and merriment. Here’s an excerpt:

3) The Food
Unless you’re the type to raid the pantry days before your guests arrive, it’s best to order the treats, cookies and cake ahead of time. If you do most of the prep a day or so before the party, you’ll have more time to open your presents when your guests arrive. As for choosing between a sit-down dinner and buffet, it’s really a matter of personal preference. But I can tell you from experience that if you choose to have a buffet, it’s better to invite your friends with the shortest snouts. Either way, make sure you have enough for leftovers.

Download the complete "5 Tips for a Great Birthday Party" now!

A successful party is, of course, all about the treats. If you need to stock the pantry ahead of the big event, I'm here to help you convince your human significant other to let you use the credit card. Buy your treats at WhiskerGifters.com and you’ll get:

• Free Shipping on All Treats (Even Cat Treats)*
• An Additional 10% Off When You Enter Code WGB-061909

I hope your party is a huge success. Feel free to share your party stories by clicking on the “COMMENTS” button below.

Sincerely,
Baron, Director of Dog Stuff

*The legal beagle wants me to clarify that free shipping is to anywhere in the US.

Baron’s Postscript: “Join the Birthday Club for Dogs and I’ll send you a free birthday postcard card every year via US mail. That’s right, the US Mail. If we all stop using the postal service because we think the price of a stamp is too high, we won’t have mailmen to chase anymore, will we."

Jester’s Postscript: “I created the Birthday Club for Cats first. Baron copied me.”

Saving a Cat's Soul

Greetings and Salu-tail-tions,
FULL BATHTUB ALERT!!!!!

Are Your Cats Old Enough to Learn About Jesus?

Cats, it appears your humans are looking for yet another excuse to stick you in the tub. This time, it’s under the guise of saving your souls. Eternal or otherwise, Baron and I want to warn you that with salvation comes a very wet head. Yours.

Now, with the economy the way it is, there’s nothing wrong with saving a few souls and putting them away for a rainy day. But, in our opinion, a boom in the forced saving of souls can only lead to a bust in catnip sales. So until I can use my own tongue to wash away sin, I’ll opt for eternal damnation.

Let us know if your human has tried to save you.

Sincerely,
Baron, Director of Dog Stuff
Jester, Director of Cat Stuff

Baron’s Postscript - "I would say I'm more spiritual than religious. I can’t really kneel that well anymore."

Jester’s Postscript - "I lived with a foster family until I was 3 months old. They must have been very religious because every time I jumped up on the kitchen counter they yelled, "GOD **** ** JESTER."

The Whisker Gifters Blog – The Inaugural

An Open Letter to America's Pets

Dear Pets,
Did you know that your human significant others are on the internet daily discussing issues concerning you? These discussions are taking place everywhere - in forums, on blogs, in emails. Further, decisions are being made about your life over which you have no control. And it's all being done without your knowledge.

The mission of the Whisker Gifters Blog is to keep you informed on topics that affect your life and matter to you. We won't shy away from hot-button topics such as politics, religion, hemp collars, raw diets or rich and famous dogs.

Trust us to keep you informed.

We'll keep it simple today and leave you with a Haiku.

First blog due today
Hard to meet deadlines without
opposable thumbs

Let us know what you think.

Sincerely,
Baron, Director of Dog Stuff
Jester, Director of Cat Stuff